|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Calling all vegetarians, vegans and health food lovers! There's a restaurant in Las Vegas that combines the best in healthy eating AND shares ALL of the GOOD things about a visit to the hospital, with none of the bad things. What restaurant is this? The one and only, Heart Attack Grill!
Photo: It's 2 o'clock in the afternoon on Monday, September 17, 2012, and I'm about to step into what has become the most controversial, talked about, and fun burger joint on the planet, the Heart Attack Grill, located at the east end of the "Fremont Street Experience." Just outside the entrance to the restaurant, there is a large, digital scale, and if you weigh 350 pounds or more, and if you weigh in, with a doctor or a nurse before you order your burger, your burger is on the house.
Photo: As you walk in the door, you're greeted by a "nurse," and you become a "patient." Naturally, patients need to wear the proper attire when they're being "treated," so the "nurse" dresses each "patient" in a hospital gown, in keeping with the "faux hospital" theme or the restaurant. Here, the greeting "nurse" dresses Andrea, while her friend, Angela, who is already dressed in the proper attire, approvingly looks on.
Photo: This happy group of "patients" have been dressed, and eagerly are awaiting "treatment." I've never seen so many happy faces on "patients" who are about ready to undergo "treatment." Note that each "patient" has a tag wrapped on their wrist showing which foods they have ordered. If they wish, they can have a "doctor" examine them with a stethoscope.
Photo: Heart Attack Grill's decor is almost like a sports bar, and it's comfortable, attractive and garish. One of the main attractions is the full-service bar, that offers plenty of comfortable seating, and a good place to observe the festivities. Everybody in the restaurant was enjoying themselves, as Heart Attack Grill is truly a fun place to enjoy a delicious burger. Note that all of the patrons, errrrr, "patients," are dressed in hospital smocks. By the way, Heart Attack Grill doesn't refer to itself as a restaurant... they prefer the term "health clinic."
Photo: This group of happy "patients" are enjoying a fantastic lunch. Beverages sold at Heart Attack Grill include Mexican-bottled Coca-Cola, with real sugar, several brands of beer, served in 24-oz cans, sodas, super-high calorie "Butter-fat Shakes," and a full service bar. You can purchase unfiltered Lucky Strike cigarettes from a machine, or if you don't smoke, you can purchase candy cigarettes. You can also purchase bottled water... As a marketing strategy, Heart Attack Grill has encouraged controversy, and it has been criticized by the liberal media for it's portrayal of nurses, as "boy-toys" and sex objects. Several nursing organizations have criticized the naughty nurse theme as well. My take on this matter? If you don't like the restaurant, or you don't agree with their marketing strategy, then just don't go. It's as simple as that...
Photo: This "patient" is happily receiving an "injection" of a mixture of vodka and gelatin, by one of the "nurses," eager to "treat" the "patients" under their care. One of the many slogans the restaurant uses is, "Alcohol, it's good for you!" Amen...
Photo: I had the pleasure of meeting Angela and Andrea, who are two charming visitors from Columbia, who were splitting a "Single Bypass Burger" and an order of "Fatliner Fries," deep fried in lard. Word of Heart Attack Grill has spread to South America! I asked the gals how they'd heard about the restaurant, and they said it was all over the local media.
Photo: Heart Attack Grill's menu is quite simple, as they offer burger and fries. That's it! The burgers come in four varieties, and are known as "Bypass Burgers." So, you can order a "Single Bypass Burger," as my friends from Columbia did, a double, triple, or in my case, a "Quadruple Bypass Burger." As a side dish, I ordered "Fatliner Fries," fries cooked in pure lard. My "nurse" who was tending bar, poses with my imposing lunch. Note that she must hold on to the sticks to keep my burger standing, as it's that ENORMOUS.
Photo: My "prescription" of a "Quadruple Bypass Burger," along with a side of "Fatliner Fries" - cooked in pure lard- and a 24-oz can of Coors beer. The "quad" consists of four beef patties - that's two pounds of beef - five slices of American cheese, red onion, tomato and the restaurant's own special sauce. In addition, I ordered the option bacon - twenty slices! - and the bacon comes "unadulterated," in other words, the grease isn't drained. Critics have used terms, such as "world's worst junk food" or "nutritional pornography" to describe the "quad," but I beg to differ, as this is one delicious burger! There is a banner on the outside of the building that advertises that the "quad" has 8000 calories, and who knows how many calories the fries contain? Just for the record, on a normal day in my life, I usually take in around 1500 calories, so this lunch equals several of my "normal" days. But, I'm on vacation, and I'm in Las Vegas, so who cares?????
Photo: Back in 2007, I had the opportunity to enjoy a "prescription" at the Tempe location, where I got to meet "Doctor" Jon Basso, the "Chief Surgeon," owner, and mastermind behind the restaurant. The good doctor was only too glad to inspect my "prescription" with his stethoscope to insure that all was well, and that it met the nutritional requirements of the "hospital."
Photo: Dressed in my hospital smock, I sit at the bar, and pose with my healthy "prescription," ready to pig-out and enjoy!
Photo: Andrea and I comment about the size of the "prescription" that I'm about ready to enjoy. EeeeeHawwww!! I asked her if she wanted to help me with it, and she said it was all that she could do to finish her half of the "single" that she was splitting with her girlfriend, Angela.
Photo: An hour or so after my "prescription" was delivered to me, this is what remained of my "Quadruple Bypass Burger." I ate, what? ... 75% of the burger and maybe 60% of the fries? That's not bad for a 60-year old dude that weighs 152 pounds. I really attempted to eat the whole thing, and I gave it the ol' college try. Just for the record, I didn't eat anything for dinner that night!
Photo: I was a bad "patient" for not finishing my "prescription," so I was treated with a session of "pain management therapy" from "nurse" Rikki. Had I been able to finish my entire "prescription," I would have been rewarded by being placed in a wheelchair, and being wheeled out to the bus stop by my "personal nurse." The other "patients" are enjoying the spectacle that I'm making of myself. What an enjoyable way to spend an hour or two! Because of the enormous calorie and fat count of the burgers dished out at Heart Attack Grill, many critics have labeled the fare as "nutritional pornography," and worse.... Even the owner, Jon Basso advises "patients," which is the term used for customers, "You shouldn't eat our food." But why not spurge and enjoy yourself? You're in Las Vegas, you're enjoying the Fremont Street Experience, you want to savor one of the best commercially-produced burger in the business, and you want to have fun! In my opinion, a visit to Heart Attack Grill is what Las Vegas is all about, and an experience that can't be missed. Heart
Attack Grill Copyright(c) 2012 eRench Productions. All rights reserved. This site has been on the web since December 22, 2002.
|
